Reflections of Me: I Talk To Myself. Continued

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     Sometimes I talk to myself.  In this phenomena I am not alone, thankfully.  Else I might think me mad.

    Hmmm.  I just might be mad anyway.  Fortunately, I am not alone in this, either.  Perhaps, better to say, UNfortunately I am not alone in this either.  I am also nearing completion of my 75th year.  10 out of 10 Republicans, and 8 out of 10 Democrats, agree: I am too old not to be affected by dementia or Alzheimer's disease.  Just ask them, they'll tell you.  They're young, and still in the Know-It-All stage of development.  Plus, they can neither read nor write nor spell nor use grammar properly.  They can do a mean click-post emojis though.

    Makes them perfectly capable of running a entire Nation, of course.

    Anyway, I recently had this conversation with myself:

Self: What's happening, old dude?

Me: Eh, same old, same old.  Hey, who woke you up?

Self: You did.  You forget already?

Me:  Forget what? And, was it important?

Self:  Why you asking me?  Weren't you there?

Me:  Where?  What were we talking about again?

Self:  The price of tea in China.

Me:  Why do we keep tea in china?  Use the cheap cups!  If it's in china, it's gonna be expensive!

Self:  I give up.

Me:  You can't give up if I don't give up!

Self:  Fine.  You give up first!

Me:  I never give up.  I gave up giving up.

Self: Isn't that giving up?

Me: Stop bothering me with these stupid questions!  I give up!

Self: Too late.  Missed your chance.

Me: Damn, story of my life.  Okay, where was I?

Self: Right here.

Me:  Good.  I thought maybe I'd moved and forgot.

Self: What if you forgot first, then moved?

Me:  Naw.  I'd remember that!

Self: What about this election?

Me: What?  Am I running?  I can't be ; I'm barely moving!

Self: Well, you said you were, but nobody cared.

Me:  Good.  That means we are already in good hands with whoever is in charge.

Self: It's whomever, but that's not important.

Me:  Then why did you say it?

Self: I didn't.  You did.

Me:  Fine.  Okay, what office am I running for?

Self: President of the United States.

Me:  Oh, no.  Nope.  I may be dumb, but I'm not that dumb.  Only a fool would want that job.  Or a mentally deranged wannabe dictator.

Self: Handy, that, since one of the people running is just that.

Me:  Oh, is Trump running again?

Self: Yep.  Either him or Putin.  Can't tell them apart. In fact, can't tell them anything.

Me:  Fine. I got nothing to tell them.  Hell, I got nothing to tell me.

Self: Then, why are we talking?

Me:  I don't know. Thought ya wanted to.  I'm good.

Self:  That's questionable.

Me:  Was that a insult?

Self: Do you want it to be?

Me:  Not really.  Trying to think here, but us talking takes up all my remaining brain space.

Self: Space?  I live in here, and it's completely filled with old, dusty file cabinets.  There's no space left!

Me:  Well, there might be important stuff in there!  How I gonna know if you keep yapping?

Self: You telling me to shut up?

Me:  Yes!!

Self: Fine.  But if you start opening any of these, I'm gonna start sneezing, and you don't want that.

Me:  Ah, well, probably a lot of useless crap about algebra and geography and isosceles triangles.  Maybe I'll just do a massive brain dump.

Self: Wouldn't be the first time.


    And thus that conversation ended.  Well, not ended, but I need a nap.  Milk & cookies later?

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